Culture Notes

Kinship and in-law relationships are greatly honored in Vietnamese culture. Each member must be addressed using the correct pronoun that indicates their status and relationship to others.

The following section introduces the pronounces generally, although you should keep in mind that the specific rule may differ depending on the region.

1/ Relatives:

• Words for Uncle:
  • Bác: Father or Mother’s older siblings
  • Chú: Father’s younger brother / Husband of Dì
  • Cậu: Mother’s younger brother
• Words for Aunt:
  • Bác: Father or Mother’s older siblings
  • Bá: Mother’s older sister
  • Cô: Father’s younger sister
  • Dì: Mother’s younger
  • Mợ: Wife of Cậu
  • Thím: Wife of Chú as father’s younger brother
• Words for Cousin:
  • Anh họ: A male cousin with a higher status in the family
  • Chị họ: A female cousin with a higher status in the family
  • Em họ: Used for cousins of both genders of lower status in the family

The status of a child is partly determined by age but it depends more on the parents’ status in the family.

For example, the children of Bác have a higher status than the children of Chú. The children of Bá have a higher status than the children of Dì.

2/ In-laws:

Marriages establish new relationships in the family. These relationships mean new ways to refer to members.

There are four words related to In-law relationships: Vợ – Chồng – Dâu – Rể

• Vợ = the wife
• Chồng = the husband
• Dâu = A female member ENTERING the family through marriage
• Rể = A male member ENTERING the family through marriage

How to use these words:

• The wife naturally calls the husband “Chồng“
• The wife shares the same status with the husband, so she uses the same pronouns that her husband uses to refer to others in the family. She can add the word “chồng” after the pronouns:
  • The husband’s mother is called “Mẹ“, or “Mẹ chồng“
  • The husband’s father is called “Bố“, or “Bố chồng“
  • The husband’s siblings are called “Anh, Chị, Em“, or “Anh chồng, Chị chồng, Em chồng“
• The husband calls the wife “Vợ“
• The husband calls other members in the wife’s family using the same pronouns as the wife. He can add the word “vợ” after the pronouns:
  • The wife’s mother is called “Mẹ“, or “Mẹ vợ“
  • The wife’s father is called “Bố“, or “Bố vợ“
  • The wife’s siblings are called “Anh, Chị, Em“, or “Anh vợ, Chị vợ, Em vợ“
• The husband’s family refers to the wife the same way they refer to the husband. They can add the word “dâu” after the pronoun:*
  • The husband’s parents call the wife “Con“, or “Con dâu”
  • The husband’s grandparents and adult relatives call the wife “Cháu“, or “Cháu dâu“
  • The husband’s siblings call the wife “Chị, Em” or “Chị dâu, Em dâu“
• The wife family refers to the husband the same way they refer to the wife. They can add the word “rể” after the pronoun:*
  • The wife’s parents call the husband “Con“, or “Con rể“
  • The wife’s grandparents and adult relatives call the husband “Cháu“, or “Cháu rể“
  • The wife’s siblings call the husband “Anh, Em” or “Anh rể, Em rể“

*Note that these rules do not apply to nieces and nephews. They will use words in section 1.